One of my favorite singers/songwriters is P!nk. I was listening to her new album in the car on my way home from my job interview. One of the lyrics, "Are you just getting by?" really stuck with me today. Here I am just getting by and I'll probably get called back for this job today and I will have to turn it down. I go in for a second job interview tomorrow with the state of Oregon DMV and if they offer me the job I have to turn it down too. These jobs would secure my finances. Unfortunately, they don't make any room for my son coming home. You're probably asking why even bother going to the interviews? Well, I have to in order to receive my tiny unemployment check of $122 a week. I also run the risk of losing my unemployment for turning down a job interview. I am barely getting by and going crazy trying to find a balance to my financial worries and the absolute necessity and desire to be home when Harlan needs me most. I just feel like screaming!
The next few months are going to be tough. I should be able to start school in June and get financial aid. Until then, I have no income. Tax refunds are on hold because of educational credits, I still haven't been approved for unemployment, my son's father hasn't paid child support in 6 months and when he does, it's only $150 a month. I wish the state would collect the $10k he is past due. That son-of-a-bitch hasn't even called to see how Harlan is doing.
On a lighter note, before I go pickup my boyfriend from class, we got our new couch and Harlan's new bed today. Our living room looks so much better! We dropped some stuff off at the consignment store to sell and hung up some decorations at home. Our place is very tiny. These apartments used to be hotels. I am looking forward to cooking tonight and enjoying some Vampire Diaries and The Walking Dead. I can't wait to start making makeup and marketing my makeup. I did almost finish my business plan yesterday!
Love,
Jenny
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